Category Archives: Doorman Diaries

They Pull Me Back In!

As I mentioned, these Doorman Diaries are from a time when I worked at Small Bar on Park Boulevard. It’s been well over a year-and-a-half since I stopped working there, but I try to visit often. Once a week or so, actually. It’s the people–both the ones I worked with and the customers–who bring me back. I simply enjoy the mix of folks, the conversation, the people-watching.

Recently, I ended up at Small Bar by myself after an…adventure. I had been conversing on the book of faces with someone I knew from way back when in the old Mod days. We decided it might just be easier to go grab a beer. Naturally, I suggested Small Bar. Somehow we ended up going to talk a friend of hers out of doing something stupid. He had been drinking and made a vaguely “done with life” type of comment to her in a text. (She has been dating him and another gentleman on and off for the last five years or so.) Without going into a lot of detail, I’ll just say he definitely needed to be out of the house, but he was in no condition to actually go to a bar. I drove them both to her place, whereupon the other guy she’d been dating showed up. Oops. After a few minutes, I departed for Small Bar, adventure accomplished.

Or so I thought.

An hour or so after I got there, the doorman came in and told a couple of us who were standing in the “alley” area that we should see these two guys who had come out of Bourbon Street, heading past Small Bar in the direction of El Zarape. He said neither of them could walk, but they were both trying to help each other do so. The end result was that it looked like some bizarre form of ultimate fighting–they were basically body-slamming each other into the ground every four or five steps. When we got out to the street, we all realized that one of them was now injured, bleeding from the back of his head. A guard from Bourbon Street ran back and got towels. We convinced the injured guy to sit down while I ended up calling 911. Drunk Guy #2 kept trying to get Drunk Guy #1 to stand up, and we kept having to convince him that, no, that wasn’t a good idea. Especially as he was the reason Drunk Guy #1 was bleeding. Apparently, Drunk Guy #2 had tried to carry Drunk Guy #1 and instead dropped him on his head. On the metal grate around a small tree.

The ambulance arrived. I told them what I knew and let them take over.

That’s part of the job I do not miss. At all.


A Gentleman In A White Dress, or, Three Nights Of Fun

More Doorman Diaries!

MAY 8, 2010

12:32 am: Large group of approximately 7 females walking from Adams to Bourbon Street, laughing loudly between El Zarape and Small Bar, but quiet down just before they reach me. Simultaneously, a group of 3 males depart Bourbon Street and are very loud wile standing in the street looking for a cab.

12:35 am: 4 females in front of Bourbon Street, laughing loudly.

12:53 am: Saw a male who had exited Bourbon Street urinating behind a car. He tried to enter Small Bar, but I simply blocked his path and shook my head. He then staggered back to Bourbon Street, obviously intoxicated–and they let him in. However, I told the Lei Lounge doorman what I saw and he ran over just as the guy was going inside. The Bourbon Street bouncers stopped him and sent his whole group away.

1:02 am: Large loud group in front of Bourbon Street, laughing, yelling, and clapping.

1:30 am: 4 males depart Bourbon Street toward El Zarape. 3 walking, 1 riding piggy-back, too drunk to walk.

1:31 am: Group outside Bourbon Street. Lots of yelling. (“LORENZO!”)

1:32 am: Male ran out of Small Bar and asked where he could “take a piss” as the line inside was too long. I directed him to Lei Lounge. They kindly let him use their restroom even though they had already called last call.

MAY 13, 2010

1:00 am: Group at corner table/booth and group at long table closest to exit in Small Bar are throwing coasters at each other. Also singing VERY loud, drowning out street noise.

1:03 am: A loud group exits Bourbon Street but quickly disperses.

1:36 am: Group of 4 males and 1 female exit Bourbon Street, crossing toward Madison. Female is yelling at the top of her lungs.

MAY 15, 2010

10:55 pm: Bourbon Street has some sort of “Carnival Night” going on, with popcorn, cotton candy, a bubble machine, and alcoholic Sno-Cones. That said, it’s been fairly quiet so far. Why do I think this is going to change?

11:47 pm: Denied entry to 2 males who have been here a few times in the past. One had an expired ID and the other was just a bit too intoxicated.

12:28 am: Fight out in street in front of Bourbon Street. Might have been 2 different females trying to get a cab. Bourbon Street security broke it up, but there was a lot of yelling.

12:40 am: Car with loud (no?) muffler set off the alarm of a truck parked across from El Zarape.

1:05 am: Just noticed that what I first thought was a bus parked down across from The Lancers is actually a lunch truck, open for business.

1:07 am: Group of approximately 12 outside Bourbon Street. Lots of piercing whistles and yelling.

1:10 am: 3 males dressed for the drag queen contest at Bourbon Street, walking past El Zarape toward the direction of Small Bar and Bourbon Street are SCREAMING. I quietly and politely asked them to respect the neighbors. They loudly and rudely refused.

1:40 am: A gentleman in a white dress and up-do wig is standing in the middle of the street with a bunch of balloons, yelling “BITCH!” at each passing car.

1:50 am: From amongst the huge crowd from Bourbon Street making scads of noise outside, a Small Bar customer came up to the gate and made an extremely loud and piercing whistle, trying to get his friends to hurry up for the bus. I did get him to stop, but he’d obviously already made a huge noise.

A Night On Park Boulevard: April 29 & May 6, 2010

Here I start a new category on my blog. It’s notes from the time I worked as a doorman at Small Bar on Park Boulevard. The bar was relatively new at that time, and a few complaints (mostly about noise) had been lodged. So the owners began having the guys at the door keep notes as to goings on, especially after 10pm when the San Diego noise curfew takes effect, mostly to show that Small Bar was not the source of the problem. For a visual, facing the street from Small Bar, Lei Lounge is directly to the right, Bourbon Street is just past Lei Lounge–to the left is the issue. There are several apartments above the businesses between Small Bar and El Zarape. It’s a relatively short stretch, probably about the same distance as the front of Bourbon Street and Lei Lounge combined. But the problem is that it is residential . . . and just beyond it is a business that stays open until after the bars have closed: El Zarape taco shop. I got my hands on a couple of the old notebooks. Enjoy the transcripts.


8:20 pm: Turned away a male for intoxication. He insisted he was not on anything, but motor skills were impaired & speech slurred at times.

10:05 pm: Loud group of approximately 6 males and 1 female outside Lei Lounge yelling and laughing loudly.

10:45 pm: 2 males ran across the street from El Zarape to a truck, yelling loudly.

11:35 pm: 3 females exited Bourbon Street toward El Zarape, passing Small Bar. They started shrieking and poking each others’ breasts.

11:55 pm: Group of 7 standing in front of Lei Lounge door, talking. Not too loud, but going on for several minutes.

11:56 pm: For the last 2 or 3 hours, the group at the window table inside Small Bar has been very loud. Then again, they have been trying to hold a conversation over the music.

12:28 am: Group of 7 from Bourbon Street heading toward El Zarape–they became loud just after passing Small Bar.

1:00 am: Group at window table is still audibly loud from outside, even though the music was turned down half an hour ago. Dan asked them to keep it down a bit. We’ll see…


10:37 pm: A male got out of an SUV in between Small Bar and El Zarape . . . with a megaphone. He turned it on and started yelling through it to the bouncers at Bourbon Street. I approached him, pointed out that he is in a residential zone, and asked him to turn off the speaker. He apologized and complied.

10:43 pm: Group of 4 females in front of Lei Lounge, talking and laughing loudly. Asked them to keep it down. They apologized, but did not quiet down very much.

11:07 pm: Lei Lounge doors are still open and music is blaring.

11:10 pm: 5 patrons exit Lei Lounge, heading past Small Bar toward El Zarape, talking and laughing loudly. I asked them to keep voices down as it’s  a residential area. They complied.

11:57 pm: A group of 6 males walking to Bourbon Street from the direction of El Zarape were talking and laughing loudly as they approached Small Bar. When they passed I politely asked them to keep their voices down. They refused.

12:10 am: Just learned from a patron that Bourbon Street is having a wet underwear contest tonight. Great.

12:14 am: 1 male and 2 females in front of Bourbon Street yelling and otherwise conducting themselves in a loud manner. They started walking in the direction of El Zarape. As they passed Small Bar I said, “Hey folks, just so you know this is a residential area, so–” and they cut me off with “we don’t care!” They continued making copious amounts of noise as they headed past El Zarape and toward Adams Avenue.

12:31 am: There is a fair amount of yelling and screaming audible from inside Bourbon Street right now. I’ll guess that the wet underwear has something to do with this.

12:33 am: 2 males ran out of Bourbon Street, shrieking at the tops of their lungs. One ran straight down the center of Park Boulevard, the other paralleled him on the far sidewalk as they headed toward Adams.

1:15 am: 3 males ran from Bourbon Street toward Adams, yelling and shouting at each other. I was unable to say anything to them. After passing Small Bar, they ran into the street.

1:45 am: Group in front of Bourbon Street, singing and shouting. They head to El Zarape, but do not quiet down at my request.

1:46 am: 4 from the above group head back past Small Bar–my request for them to keep their voices down is again ignored.